Harrison’s Highly Critical, Judgemental, Elitist Rants Presents: Mac vs. PC
Fun Facts, Philosophy, Pissed off rants, Robots
Posted August 13, 2009 at 10:09 am by Severed Head
Hello, I’m on a mac, and I’d like to preach about how fucking awesome macs are, and how retarded all of you people out there who are arguing with me/other mac users. Well, let me start off with the ads I’ve been seeing on television. The PC ads I’ve seen most recently will show Microsoft giving a customer a thousand dollars or something to go find a laptop. The user will go over to the macs and go “This is too expensive. I feel like you’re just paying for the brand.” Now I admit that this is true. But. That is EXACTLY THE FUCKING POINT. YOU ARE PAYING FOR THE BRAND THAT IS ASSOCIATED WITH QUALITY. Anyway, they eventually buy the PC and they’re like “Yep, found it!” or whatever. First of all, OF COURSE THEY’RE GOING TO PICK THE PC. THERE’S 50 DIFFERENT BRANDS OF PCS OUT THERE. WHICH IS NOT NECESSARILY A GREAT THING BY THE WAY. BUT OF COURSE, IF MICROSOFT GIVES THEM THE MONEY, THEY’RE NOT GOING TO PICK THE 1 OUT OF 50 LAPTOPS WHICH IS NOT A PC. This is the end of the advertisement. Now. This is just my interpretation, but what does it say to you that they don’t, for a second, talk about the quality? That they completely ignore the customer who has already used a PC. 6 months down the road, I guarantee you, that that guy/girl from the commercial has, a number of times, been PISSED at his computer. That said, they did have a series of ads of people who have used PCs for a long time. The one where they went “I’m a PC,” and showed everyone doing various things. OF COURSE YOU’RE A FUCKING PC. THEY STILL OWN MOST OF THE MARKET. THEY’RE STILL POPULAR. THAT DOESN’T MEAN THEY’RE GOOD. AND ALSO NOTICE THAT, AGAIN, SOMEHOW, THEY MANAGED TO FAIL TO MENTION THE QUALITY OF COMPUTERS VERSUS THAT ON MACS, WHEREAS, THAT’S ALL THE MAC COMMERCIALS TALK ABOUT BECAUSE THEY KNOW THAT MACS ARE FUCKING BETTER!
That said, the Apple ads are a little bit hard-hitting and not always accurate, but you know what fucking rocks about macs? They last FOREVER. People argue about viruses being available for the mac. Every few months you’ll see a story in the media about how a mac virus got out. Mostly these articles are published by the uneducated. A virus is a program that you give no access to, which invades and repopulates on your system for nefarious purposes. What all of these articles are referring to is a Trojan. Condom jokes aside/completely ignored, they are files which act as the Trojan Horse did. They can infect your system and fuck around, but only because you downloaded them, and you opened up the installer and let them free. This can be true on any operating system.
One of the main reasons that viruses don’t run on macs is because there’s not a whole bunch of backround programs open at any given time. I mean, there’s the standard stuff, but you can see EXACTLY which applications are open, whereas on a PC, that information is not readily available.
The other main reason is that nobody writes viruses for the mac. Not as many people use macs, so why bother? But the fact is that I don’t have to worry about them.
I also don’t have to worry about Adware/spyware/malware. It just simply doesn’t exist. And I know that the argument out there: “Well, you only get that stuff if you don’t protect yourself, and you roam the internet freely and carelessly.” Uh. Yeah. But that’s what I want to do. What if I want to go to a shit load of shady websites without fucking up my computer? I want to be able to roam the internet carelessly, LIKE I’M DOING RIGHT NOW ON A FUCKING MAC.
The other thing about macs that are better: Crash-proof. I’m not saying they don’t crash, or that my computer doesn’t freeze up in terms of loading times, but we don’t have a blue screen of death. Nearly all frozen processes can be force-quitted because Apple has a system design which allows for all applications to run independently of each other. That is, if Firefox crashes, the rest of the system is not going down with it. On Windows, if one thing crashes, you might as well just restart.
So, in terms of operating systems, you have Windows, Mac, Linux, or other. A lot of people might argue for Linux as well. It’s an open-source operating system that is pretty secure. I might argue for Linux too, IF I DIDN’T HAVE A JOB AND WERE NOT GOING TO SCHOOL. You see, I could learn a new operating system, and spend hours and hours and hours and days and weeks and months finding software that is close to the equivalent of that on Macs and PCs, but why bother? I’ve got fucking shit to do, and I’m happy with my mac.
The other main argument for PC users is gaming. I can’t lie, PC users have more availablity to games than mac users do. But quite honestly, I don’t want to be the kind of person who spends THAT much time and THAT much money upgrading my computer to do this stuff. I can accept those people who do, but we simply have different priorities. Mine is in music and media and all that. Time and time again, it has been shown that macs are simply better at recording music or making movies.
Now, style. If it’s not clear to you already that Vista (specifically, Luna) and XP and all of that were ripping off Mac OS X, then you’re just dumb. They are. That’s all there is to it. They’re constantly playing catch up with the new mac operating system software.
The majority of people I know who are against macs? People who have PCs all of their lives. These are the people who have never BOTHERED to question their choice. The ones who are REALLY skeptical about macs because they are “so elitist” and “cultured” and “intelligent”. GOD FORBID YOU DO SOMETHING SMART AND GO ON AN OPERATING SYSTEM THAT WAS DESIGNED PRIMARILY FOR THE USER SO THAT NEARLY EVERYTHING IS INTUITIVE. And I can understand that the operating system isn’t as intuitive to some people, but that’s because Windows make you go around and try to trick the fucking system into doing what you want it to do. OR. IT’S BECAUSE THOSE PEOPLE ARE JUST FUCKING DUMB.